Counting Calories + Anxiety Attacks

Hello there! Happy Thursday!Β  I’ve been depressed and anxious AF, so I haven’t posted on here in a few days … I’m going to try to push past my mental issues and post today (although I’m not feeling 100% yet).

Last night, I had a MAJOR anxiety attack. It was BAD. For nearly three hours, I was walking around the apartment with my mouth hanging open in a pathetic attempt to breathe, my eyes were “looking up”/going cross-eyed, my neck was stiff, and I was humming to calm myself. I remember getting in bed and trying to sleep … I heard Luke come in around 12:30 a.m. but I didn’t want to disturb him with my anxiety, so I just stayed in bed, humming softly to myself. I finally fell asleep around 1:00. Anxiety attacks SUCK. I also had a mini-anxiety attack this morning … it was crappy, but I got it under control pretty quickly. I contacted Rachael, my psychiatric nurse, and I’m hoping she can help me very soon … my anxiety is getting ridiculous.

In food-related news, I’m trying something new with my eating – I’m counting calories to feel in control of what goes into my mouth. No worries about restricting, my intake is 1350 calories, which is a good number. πŸ™‚ My main focus is going to be on protein as I need about 125 g of protein a day for my body. I’d like to keep losing some fat and gain muscle, so protein is imperative. No exercise today as I’m still reeling from the anxiety attacks, but that’s okay … I plan on going to the gym tomorrow (fingers crossed). πŸ˜‰

Breakfast was 2/3 C of cottage cheese (120 calories) and 1 C of sliced strawberries (53 calories). Coffee with creamer (70 calories) to drink (I don’t count the coffee calories, and I had another cup of black coffee with stevia afterwards).

Total calories for breakfast: 243

Lunch was two boiled eggs (144 calories), and I roasted some veggies: 1 C of carrots (52), two jalapeno peppers (26), a C of zucchini (33), and 1 C of broccoli (31) … I topped the eggs with about a teaspoon of mustard (5) and ate my veggies with two tablespoons of salsa (10).Total calories for lunch: 302

Luke and I went to the store after lunch, and Persephone received a nice new pink collar with flowers on it (it also has a little bell). She wasn’t too thrilled about her new collar, as you can see, but she lost her old one and needed one.

Luke and Caprica were very cozy this afternoon too … (Luke looks mad, but he’s just concentrating … I often mistake his “concentration face” for anger, ha!)

My snack today was a Lavender Love Kombucha (60 calories), 1 C of red bell pepper slices (46), 1/2 of a cucumber (23), and two tablespoons of Roasted Pine Nut Hummus (80).

Total calories for snack: 209

Dinner tonight was a big one! I roasted 8 oz. of chicken breast (374 calories) tossed in a tablespoon of Smokey Mesquite BBQ sauce and had 1 tablespoon on the side (62), and I also roasted some veggies: 1 C of cauliflower (29), 9 asparagus spears (30), 1 C of yellow squash (34), 1 C of broccoli (31), and 2 tablespoons of fat free Hidden Valley Ranch (25).

Total calories for dinner: 584

Total calories for the day: 1,341/1,350

I think I did pretty damn well today, so huzzah! I’ll take all the credit, ha! Here’s hoping for an anxiety-free night for me, y’all. I’m keeping my fingers crossed!

Question of the Day: Do you struggle with anxiety? If so, how do you help yourself push through it?

~ Mandy


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