Feline on a Bike

Howdy there and Happy Saturday! How are you today? I woke up this morning, and the first thing I spotted was Calliope making herself comfortable on Luke’s woolly bike seat! Naughty kitt lit!

She was very pleased with herself, as you can plainly see.

I’m going to try something new with my eating schedule, y’all. I’m going to try eating every two hours or so, and I’m going to break up my meals. For instance, instead of having chicken and veggies in one setting at lunch, I’ll have my chicken around 12, and then my veggies around 2. I’m hoping this routine will help with any hunger pains and help me to eat a little less (I went overboard yesterday with my snacks).

I wasn’t too hungry for breakfast once again, so I scrambled two eggs with a tablespoon of shredded cheese and S+P and topped with salsa. Simple! One cup of coffee with creamer to drink.

Soon after breakfast, I drove to Planet Fitness and did 45 minutes on the elliptical. (Calliope was *still* sleeping on the bike when I got home.) It was a bit of an overcast, rainy, lazy day, so I’m glad that I pushed that into the back of my mind and went to the gym anyway!

My hair braiding is slowly but surely getting neater – I did two French braids this morning before my workout, and they’re looking much tighter and more even. It’s harder for me to do them on clean hair still, it’s much easier when my hair has gone a day without a wash. I tried doing them on my clean hair after my shower in an unsuccessful and frustrating attempt … ah well. I’m getting better.

I had a veggie-snack around 10:30 – sugar snap peas and salted cucumber slices with salsa (I’m a salsa-fiend, what can I say?). Little veggie-snacks keep me sane throughout the day, I have to say.

The first part of my lunch was 6 oz of baked BBQ chicken with some celery and Bacon Cheddar Ranch. I mainly wanted to focus on the chicken, but the plate looked bare, so I added some extra crunch.

Soon after lunch, I ran to the store and bought a ton of tasty goodies! Huzzah! Around 3:30, I had what I’m considering to be my second part of lunch, which was some raw cauliflower and red bell pepper with hummus and salsa.Around 5:30, it was cocktail time! I had a Trilogy Kombucha, and it’s by far my favorite flavor.

Dinner happened around 7. I baked more BBQ chicken and some broccoli, sweet potato, jalapeno, and carrot and placed them all on a bed of lettuce, a bit of rice, and with a sprinkling of cheese. BBQ sauce and Sriracha ranch along with a few Fritos as a topper.

Alrighty, that’s all I got for tonight! ๐Ÿ™‚ Hope everyone had a fabulous day – I’m off to watch Ghost Adventures on Travel Channel.

~ Mandy

30 Minutes a Day

Hi there! How are you doing today? My moods have been pretty stable lately, and I’m very thankful! Bipolar disorder is a harsh mistress sometimes, and I still experience bizarre moods throughout the day, but I like to think that I’ve been in a balanced way lately (I’ll have to ask Luke, of course, as he’s the ultimate gauge for my moods, but I think I’ve been steady).

I admit that I had giant LOW and a good cry over my body yesterday … I was convinced that my stomach looked terrible! That’s just part of it, I think, but it sucks when it happens. I’m trying to keep positive and look at any changes in my body as a positive thing, not a detrimental one. After all, my body *is* going to change if I keep working out and eating well. It’s NOT a bad thing at all! I’m just so used to being extremely thin and disordered that it’s hard to see any change, but I’m working on adjusting my perspective.

I’m upping my protein intake for real this time, y’all. I want to see results, so I need to get with the program and stop living off fruits and veggies. So today and from now on, my focus will be on protein, protein, protein. My eats may become a little boring as I tend to eat the same thing once I find a good balance, but I like sharing them on here regardless. ๐Ÿ™‚

Breakfast this morning was around 9; I ate two eggs with about a tablespoon of shredded Mexican Blend cheese, S+P, and salsa. 1 cup of coffee with creamer to drink … I’m going to try cutting back. I wasn’t terribly hungry for breakfast, so I had a relatively small meal, but since it was packed with protein, it kept me full until lunch.

Soon after breakfast, I had an inkling to hit the gym. I felt a bit gross because I hadn’t taken a shower, but I washed my face, put on deodorant, put my hair into low pigtails, and I went anyway! I did the elliptical for 30 minutes and walked/ran a bit on the treadmill. I felt *so much better about my body* after exercising, y’all.

My goal is to start doing 30 minutes a day on cardio and keep up with weights – I’d do a hour on the elliptical for a few days in a row and then get burnt out and just do weights. By doing just 30 minutes, I’m getting many health benefits, such as a mood boost, and I can create a little deficit, which I do want (I’d like to lose some more belly fat to show dem abs!). If I’m feelin’ frisky, I can do 30 minutes twice a day. I don’t need to do an entire hour in one setting though … it just makes me too tired, and I need to avoid burn-out.

Luke woke up early and wanted to go to O’Reilly’s for some bike stuff, so I went with him. ๐Ÿ™‚ He was up and at ’em and worked on his bikeย all afternoon. Yes, it’s parked inside the apartment … no, I don’t mind! We don’t want it to get stolen like Luke’s old one, so it needs to stay inside with us.

Random, but I want to decorate the wall where the bike is – it’s stark white right now, and it just bugs the crap outta me! I’m gonna go to TJ Maxx and Ross to see about some cheap wall decor. I have to do something about that white space, damn it!

Lunch was at 1:00, and I enjoyed 6 oz of baked BBQ chicken (yep, I’m weighing out my proteins), roasted onion, broccoli, cauliflower, and red bell pepper all placed on a bed of spinach with Fiesta Ranch and a little extra Stubb’s BBQ sauce. It was delicious! Chicken salads are a “safe” food for me now, which is GREAT.

Vanilla chai tea with almond-coconut milk and stevia was my beverage of choice with lunch. Tea literally keeps me sane during the day as it’s something to sip and keep my tummy full – it truly helps with purge urges, in my opinion, but those urges are starting to fade.

One of my little “mini-goals” today was to start re-learning how to properly braid my hair! I did two French braids down the back, and although they need to be cleaned up a bit, they looked good enough to wear for the rest of the day, so I was pleased with myself. I want to learn how to do fish-tail braids again too. ๐Ÿ™‚ (Not the most flattering pic of me – the shadow makes me look like I have major crows feet, but I was proud, ha!) I want to have much longer hair, and I need to learn how to braid again.

I needed a pick-me-up, so I had a smoothie for a snack around 3:30 – my mix was Protein One vanilla, almond-coconut milk, a tablespoon of chia seeds, cinnamon, vanilla, and ice. Yummy!

I also munched on an apple and some peanut butter yogurt dip (I *love* that stuff, and the recipe makes a ton!).

I wasn’t very hungry around my usual dinnertime due to my large snack. Instead, I watched TV and simply vegged out in my cozy old blue socks (they are getting holes in them, damn it, but I still wear them because they’re so damn comfortable). The apartment was very clean, so I didn’t have any catching up to do this evening, which made me happy. I had planned on going back to the gym to do 30 more minutes of cardio, but I was ultimately too lazy return to the gym … oh well! I already went once, so that’s good enough for a Friday night.

I had my kombucha cocktail around 6:30 … Gingerade this time because my tummy needed some soothing after my big snack! Dinner was much later than usual, but that’s perfectly fine with me! I had more BBQ chicken with roasted onion and broccoli and a bit of rice drizzled with some ranch, BBQ, and a dab of salsa. Easy peasy, yum, yum.

Now I’m watching Expedition Unknown and trying not to think about my full tummy! Hope you had a great day, y’all!

~ Mandy

 

 

 

A New Perspective + Secret Salmon Sauce

Y’all. Last night I looked in theย  mirror and actually ADMIRED my body. I saw it all as it should be – the abs sticking out against my full belly, my muscular arms, my beautiful shape, my bare face, my lovely hair, my wide shoulders, my strength. I *am* gorgeous, and I need to treat myself as such. Yes, it’s hard to do that when your brain constantly tells you that you are ugly and fat, but I am absolutely NOT those things. This is HUGE for me, and I truly hope it becomes my normal with a new perspective of my body.

I’m still coasting around 125 lbs (today I was 126.2 lbs), and I still want to gain about 5 to 10 lbs in muscle weight. I’m trying to bulk up, and I need to eat more protein to do it! So today’s eats were centered around protein.

Breakfast this morning was two scrambled eggs with S+P and mozzarella cheese, two slices of bacon, and a piece of Dave’s Killer Bread with butter and strawberry jam. Yummy and filling with a goodly amount of protein. I considered not adding the toast, but I love me some Dave’s Killer Bread, so I toasted up a slice and thought “fuck it, I deserve toast today!” I’m glad I did because it was delish.

OJ and coffee to drink. I bought this cute cat mug at TJ Maxx yesterday … I just love it! I’m a bit of a mug hoarder, and I need to acquire a few more for my collection.

Soon after breakfast, I put on some workout clothes and headed to Planet Fitness. I did weights for about 30 minutes while listening to Miss Saigon, huzzah!

I also had a return to make at TJ Maxx, and then I drove to Target and Dillardsย  where I found the Free People Crossfire Cami that I’ve been wanting on sale in black, so I bought it. I immediately put it on upon returning home, and I just love it! Totally worth the money to me, AND it was on sale … a win win.I also did a ton of sit ups and lunges at home.

I had a salmon fillet for lunch complete with my Dad’s secret salmon sauce (recipe below). It sure is delicious! As a side dish, I had some seasoned and roasted red bell pepper, broccoli, zucchini, and carrot with a dash of EVOO. I put a drizzle of Fiesta Ranch and a dab of salsa on the veg, in typical Mandy fashion. Vanilla Chai Tea to drink.

Gary’s Secret King Salmon Sauce

Ingredients:

  • 1 1/4 C Mayonnaise
  • 2 Tbsp Dijon Mustard
  • 1 Tbsp Dill Weed
  • 1/2 Tbsp Coarse Ground Pepper
  • 1/2 Tbsp Curry Powder
  • 1/2 Tbsp Cumin
  • 2 Tsp Thyme
  • 2 Tsp Paprika (Optional)
  • 2 Tbsp Lemon Juice
  • 1 Tbsp Soy Sauce
  • 2 Cloves of Garlic, Finely Diced
  • 1/2 Onion, Pureed (Can Sub Green Onion)
  • 1/4th Juice of a Fresh Lemon

Directions: Spread a thick layer on the fish, seal it up in foil, and bake in a preheated oven at 350 degrees for 33 to 40 minutes. When done, the fish should flake easily when prodded with a fork.

I’m not a mayonnaise fan at all, y’all, but I’ll eat this sauce! It’s just SO GOOD.

Caprica made herself comfortable on Luke and his computer this afternoon.

We went to Planet Fitness around 3:00 and did some weights. Luke was very low energy today (he’s been working long hours), so we didn’t do as much as we usually do, but that’s okay! We went regardless and did something. Plus, it was my second time today, so I felt pretty good about what I did.

I wanted a snack around 4:00, so I had a Brown Cow Apricot Mango yogurt with raspberries, strawberries, a drizzle of honey, and a sprinkling of chia seeds, coconut, and almonds. Yum! I just *adore* fruit, and fresh berries never disappoint.

Around 5 o’clock, it was kombucha time! ๐Ÿ˜‰ I sipped on a Gingerberry Kombucha and thoroughly enjoyed it. I just love my little mock-tail. I should branch out and make a virgin Bloody Mary sometime.

I also had a little tasting plate of fresh veggies! I ate on some bacon cheddar ranch, hummus, snap peas, broccoli, red bell pepper, and cucumber, all sprinkled with salt. They really took the edge off my hunger.

Dinner was part chicken stir fry with rice and part Sweet and Spicy Baked Cauliflower. The cauliflower was definitely my favorite part! Yum, yum!

I ate a little too much today, but I’m dealing with it in stride. I think I’ll try to push past having *two* snacks before dinner. If I had just eaten the cauliflower for dinner, I would have been fine, methinks, but I wanted to get in some protein. Oh well, tomorrow is another day!

Now I’m watching Ghost Adventures and am thinking about vacuuming the apartment! It’s *chilly* in here, and it’s 109 degrees outside (I have a blanket around my shoulders, ha!). I may make some tea too. ๐Ÿ™‚

Hope you’ve had a great day!

~ Mandy

 

Five Things Friday

Hi there and Happy Friday! How are you doing today? I’m going to try doing a “Five Things Friday” post where I detail what I’m most grateful for, what’s going on in my life, and what’s catching my eye lately … here we go! (WARNING: this post is pretty ramble-y because I am manic AF!)

#1- My Mood

My moods have been pretty stable, y’all. I’m thrilled about that. Since I’ve committed to sobriety, I’ve been in a great place mentally. My panic attacks are few and far between, and my eyesight has been stable too. I used to visit the eye doctor about four times a year to get a contact change, but now my eyes are as happy as can be.

I’m absolutely delighted with my mood management right now. Everything seems to be working well for me, and my combo of Latuda, Trintellix, Gabapentin, Trazadone, and Buspar does the trick for me.

Yes, I still battle my moods on a daily basis – I became “buzzy” (aka manic) this morning and it lasted through the evening -but it’s *manageable* at this point. I also have to remind myself that it’s normal for people to have different moods throughout the day, and that sometimes I’m not being bipolar but just moody in a normal way. It’s rather difficult because my moods are so damn pronounced though. When I’m low, I’m LOW. When I’m up, I’m UP. But when I’m stable, I’m pretty stable, and that’s how I am most of the time. ๐Ÿ™‚

(This is one of my favorite pics that I’ve ever snapped … I love these swans and their serenity. They remind me of how peaceful my life ultimately has become compared to my last few years.)

#2 – My Luke

My Luke works so hard for us, and I’m SO grateful to have him in my life. Luke and I met nearly 11 years ago at a little horse barn in River Falls (a development near Palo Duro Canyon in Amarillo). I remember seeing him for the first time on his rearing horse, Shiloh, who was being very naughty as we drove up to check out the barn.

My mom and my sister each had a good feeling about Luke when we first met him and knew he was a very special person. I was oblivious though! He was married at the time, but after a series of unfortunate events (well, they were fortunate for ME because I ultimately got to be with Luke), he became single, and we dated for nearly 5 years. On April 20, 2012, we tied the knot at the courthouse, just the two of us.

Luke is caring, kind, gentle, and so so loving. My man is such a joy to be around (even in the morning when he’s a bit grumpy, ha!), and I’m so *lucky* to have him in my life. He’s my soulmate … not many people find a soulmate in their lives, so I realize how blessed I am with him.

#3 – Online Browsing and Shopping

I *love* browsing stores online and making wish lists at Free People and Anthropologie. I have a bit of $$ left after buying my Brahmin, so I’ve been browsing my options. I’m liking these items right now from Free People:

The Crossfire Cami in Wisteria and Army

The AKA Washed Legging in Army, Navy, and Black

I’m looking at these items in several colors, and it’s hard to decide which colors I’d like (and ultimately WEAR). I’m picky about my clothing at this point – I go for simple, neutral colors and items that aren’t very *loud* – and I’m also thinking about going to our local Target and TJ Maxx to look for similar items that I could buy without paying for shipping or the brand. I could get a lot more at Target or TJ Maxx for $100 than I could at Free People or Anthropologie, so that might be the ticket.

#4 – Healthy Food, Cooking, and Dealing with Eating Disordered Behavior

I adore cooking and making healthy meals, y’all. I’m planning on making some new recipes soon, so hopefully I can post how they turn out on here. I love sending my husband to work with a bowl of healthy food that will help him build muscle and keep him satisfied throughout the day.

Luke often has a bowl of cereal or a protein smoothie in the afternoon (he sleeps through breakfast and has never been a breakfast eater), then he eats the meal I’ve prepared for him in the evening, and he’ll grab another bowl of cereal or some kind of snack at night. Luke’s eating habits can be difficult for me because I try to eat as much as he eats, and sometimes it’s simply not enough for me; our meal times are day and night compared to each other.

I don’t always eat what I cook for Luke, I’ll admit – my eating disordered brain goes for lower calorie items like fruits and veggies. I try my best to not have aversions to foods such as protein, and I try to remind myself that everything in moderation is just fine.

Ultimately, I *DO* want to gain some muscle weight … I know I’m contradictory on here sometimes, but it’s part of my disorder. My mind goes from one extreme to the other. Right now, I’m on a fitness kick, and I’m in “gain mode.”

ED’s are a difficult battle, and my main goal right now is to *not purge* anything that I put into my body. If that means eating smaller meals more frequently and having some odd food combos, then that’s what I’m going to do. It’s my struggle, but I’m winning, and that’s what is important to me right now. I can deal with my odd food combos another time, if I’m being honest. Right now, I’m just still resisting the urge to purge, and it’s rough. But I’m going to win this battle, and I’m going to stay strong! ๐Ÿ™‚

#5 – The Critters

My cats and Drogo are my therapy pets, in all truthfulness, and I’m SO grateful to have them in my life.

Caprica has always been a lovely and loving cat, she loves being held and being petted. She walks around our heads as we sleep at night, checking on us. Her only flaw is that she likes to make loud cries at night, as if she can’t find us or misses Luke when he’s at work.

Calliope and Persephone took about three years to stop acting feral and become sweethearts. They do not like being held, but they love coming up for back and tummy scratches. Calliope *always* comes up meowing at me in the morning and right when I get into bed – she kneads on my shoulder and chest at night and loves getting back and head scratches. Persephone comes up in the morning when I’m sitting in my chair (usually blogging!), and she meows at me, gives me a tragic look, and rolls on her back, just begging for tummy pets, which I happily give her.

Drogo is a more sedate pet. He’s slow and relaxed, always hanging out under his water dish or log. He’s eating well and is getting so stinkin’ big! He’s not bite-y at all, he’s the sweetest and prettiest little thing (he’s a cinnamon calico ball python). He’s fixing to shed in this pic, but believe me, his color is a lot louder when he sheds.

Calliope loves hanging out on Drogo’s cage and checking him out!

~ My Five Things Friday was certainly interesting and quite fun and therapeutic to type out – now onto my EATS ~

Breakfast was my usual apple a day! I tried a Koru apple from New Zealand around 9, and it was mighty tasty – tart and sweet at the same time – so delish! I still prefer Pacific Rose apples, but they were out at the store, and I was jonesing for something different to try, so I picked up this little apple and gave it a go.

Lunch was a big bowl of roasted veggies right at 12 – I seasoned and roasted some cauliflower, broccoli, a large green onion, mushrooms, and some red bell pepper. I topped the delicious veg with two tablespoons of Fiesta Ranch, two tablespoons of hummus, and some salsa. In case you can’t tell from this blog, I eat a TON of veggies. Something about them is so satisfying to me, and I never purge veggies. Fruit and veg are the ultimate *safe* foods for me, so I’m just rollin’ with it. Yes, I need more protein here, and I plan to eat more protein tomorrow.

Luke and I went to the gym after lunch, and my vigor for strength training was renewed. We stayed for about an hour, and my arms and calves got a massive pump! Here are some ridiculous pics of me working out – I have Luke snap pics to remind myself that I don’t need to lose any weight but rather need to gain some muscle!

I was a wee bit manic when we went to the gym – when I’m manic, I TALK A TON … poor Luke has to endure my talkative shit, and I feel sorry for him when I’m manic as I’m surely quite annoying! But at the gym, I started to feel better.

I vowed to eat more protein and to start going every day … I pray this all comes to pass, EATING DISORDER BE DAMNED!

At 3:30, I was thirsty from the gym, so I had a Synergy Gingerade Kombucha in a wine glass. It’s my little mock-tail during the day, and it’s so YUMMY.

Dinner was a bowl of good ol’ chicken stir fry with brown rice (it’s under there, I promise!). The stir fry has baby corn, zucchini, squash, red bell pepper, broccoli, and sugar snap peasย  … I’m looking at the picture and trying to remember all that I put in it! And, duh, it’s got a goodly amount of chicken. I cheated this time and used a pre-made sauce for it though. It tasted just fine, very good, in fact, but I do prefer to make a homemade sauce (I was lazy, saw the sauce at the store, and bought it without hesitation, ha!).

Around this time, I got an email from ThredUp telling me that they gave me just $7.56 for ALL FIVE OF MY NICE, BARELY WORN ANTHROPOLOGIE CLOTHES. I’m pissed off and manic, not a great combination. I could have gotten more at a garage sale! DO NOT USE THREDUP! I’m beyond triggered as I type this sentence.

But moving on – I did over 100 sit ups out of anger, so something positive came out of the ThredUp fiasco.

As a late-evening snack, I made bacon and eggs. I scrambled two eggs with S+P and a bit of mozzarella cheese and then topped them with two slices of bacon and some salsa. Easy peasy. I needed more protein in my diet today, so I went the ol’ eggs and bacon route.

I’m currently cleaning up the apartment (rather manically, I might add) and watching Expedition Unknown on Travel Channel. I love me my Travel Channel, y’all. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Looking back, this post is a very manic post, so I apologize for the disjointed and rambling thoughts! I did very well today with my ED thoughts though, so I’m happy about that! I had only a few moments of struggle with it; it wasn’t encompassing as it usually is, and I hope that becomes my norm.

Question(s) of the Day: Do you struggle with mania and depression? Do you struggle with an eating disorder?

Have a good night, my friends!

~ Mandy

 

 

Mania + Motorcycles

Howdy! How are you doing today? I’m thinking of learning how to ride a motorcycle, y’all. I’d love to learn how to ride, have my own bike, and go on trips with my hubbers one day. Our good friend Josiah runs the local motorcycle class – he taught Luke how to ride – and I plan on taking the class where he’s my teacher. I’ll call him once I have a free weekend. Exciting stuff for me!

Yogurt parfait for breakfast! I had a Chobani Flip Pure Pear and Honey yogurt with a banana, some raspberries, a sprinkling of chia seeds, coconut shreds, almonds, and granola with a drizzle of honey. Coffee to drink.

I drove to the gym after breakfast, but I only stayed about 15 minutes … I was on the verge of an anxiety attack, so I had to come home for some extra Gabapentin – full blown anxiety attack was averted, thankfully! I drank an extra coffee around this time too, and it seemed to help; I didn’t have my usual apple around 10:30 either because I simply wasn’t hungry.

I became a wee bit manic after taking my extra Gabapentin – I call it being “zippy” – and my sloppy picture of lunch depicts my mania well. Usually I clean my utensils and clean up my plate before taking pictures of my meals, but I didn’t this time …

Lunch was a reprise of yesterday’s midday meal – I roasted broccoli, cauliflower, half of a baby avocado, and zucchini and served them with hummus, salsa, and ranch dressing; two eggs rounded out my meal as the protein! I ate them with some spicy mustard and S+P.

Luke took me to the gym around 1:00 p.m. … I needed to work out my mania, and we did just that! I felt *amazing-balls* after working out today. ๐Ÿ™‚ I worked myself out of that mania state, which was wonderful, and I topped myself by doing 330 lbs on the quad press.

(I asked Luke to snap a pic of me, so forgive the deer skull behind me, I look like I’m growing an antler out of my neck!)

Dinner was pretty simple tonight but it was *damn* delicious – I had a turkey taco salad. I browned some ground turkey with spices, added corn and black beans, and then I served it on a bed of romaine lettuce with some red bell pepper and cucumber. I topped the salad with some bacon cheese ranch dressing, mozzarella cheese, and some jalapeno Fritos. Talk about a delightful meal! (I admit that I added some salsa after snapping this pic.)

Tons of veggies were consumed today for sure! Yummy! I just love my veggies.

My dessert was a Pacific Rose apple with cinnamon, peanut butter, granola, and chocolate chips.

Now I’m off to clean up the apartment! (I may have a small coffee to keep my energy up.) I had a pretty good day, and I hope you did too! ๐Ÿ™‚

Question of the Day: Do you deal with mania and moods? If so, how do you cope?

~ Mandy

 

 

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A Weight-y Wonderful Day

Howdy there and Happy Hump Day! How are you doing today? My moods have been pretty damn stable lately, and I’m beyond thrilled! I just *adore* summertime because the sunlight and heat always help my mood.

I’ve been doing better regarding feeling too full after eating – I’m sticking to smaller meals more frequently, and it seems to be helping, so I’m very happy about that. It really helps with any binge/purge urges.

I had a Chobani Flip in Peanut Caramel Satisfaction along with a banana and a drizzle of honey for breakfast. Coffee with Salted Caramel Mocha Creamer (shit, that stuff is good) to drink.

Around 10:30, I had my usual honey crisp apple with cinnamon, almond butter, and granola. An apple a day, right? Salted caramel tea with stevia and cashew milk to drink.

I spent my morning walking Mr. Boomer, making dinner for Luke-creature, and browsing Free People and Anthropologie. I think I’ve figured out what I want … I’d like these AKA Washed Leggings in navy and army. They’re super long, so they’d be perfect for my 5’10” frame. I need more pants, so I think they’re a great buy for me. I might throw in a top or two as well, but I’m on a Target kick for cute tops right now, and I can get so much more there for the money than at Free People. I’m *considering* the You’re The One Wrap Top and the Around The World Top in Olive though … and I’m still eyeing that Brahmin purse too, so we’ll see what I end up with! ๐Ÿ˜‰

For lunch today, I hard boiled two eggs and roasted some cauliflower, broccoli, and carrot … easy peasy, if not a bit boring! I served the veggies with some hummus, ranch dressing, and salsa, and I ate the eggs with some S+P and a bit of spicy mustard.

Luke and I went to Planet Fitness and lifted weights – I can lift 310 lbs on the quad press, so I’m highly impressed with my progress. Luke snapped a few pics of me doing some arm weights, so I thought I’d share. Can you tell that I just *adore* my Wonder Woman shirt?!

We came home after running an errand, I drove to see Boomer, and I came home to an abundance of kitty cuddles going on between Caprica and Luke! Lots of love between those two. ๐Ÿ˜‰

At 4,ย I had a nice big pink grapefruit with some salt.

After I ate my grapefruit, my stomach turned sour and unhappy, and my head started to spin. I’m curious if it was interacting with my Latuda (I’m not supposed to eat grapefruit on it … yes, I did anyway today as I love grapefruit). I had some kombucha to settle my stomach.

Dinner tonight was a turkey burger with pepper jack cheese, some heirloom tomato, avocado, lettuce, and a potato bun with some sweet potato rounds. Ketchup for dipping.

After dinner, I was uncomfortably full and in some digestive distress – digestion is a b*tch for me when I eat meat-y, carb-y things like a burger, but I just have to keep getting used to it. My meal was a bit bigger than I originally thought, methinks, so I’ll try half a patty next time.

My Mom sent me a pic of her and Pieter together in Seattle … they’re such a cute couple!

I’m currently watching Expedition Unknown, am digesting my dinner, am drinking mango-infused water from Pak-a-Sak, and am enjoying my peaceful night. I have to check on Mr. Boomer one more time too!

Hope you’ve had a lovely day, my friends!

~ Mandy

Watching Mr. Boomer

Hi there and Happy Monday!ย I’ve been feeling a little low today in the mood department (i.e. fuzzy in the head, overall tired compared to my usual energetic self) … I think it’s due to taking extra Gabapentin for my anxiety attack yesterday, so I’m happy that I won’t have to take any extra anytime soon. My anxiety attacks happen about once every two weeks now, and I’m handling the situation as best I can. Extra gaba helps as does hot tea and deep breathing.

I’ve been struggling with food more than usual recently too. It’s so easy to want to restrict, y’all. I struggle with feeling too full still, even after I’ve just eaten an apple. I keep telling myself that I’m absolutely not fat and if I *feed* my body properly, I’ll gain muscle weight. I haven’t been feeding my body correctlyย  (during my blogging hiatus, I ate mainly vegetables), and I must remedy that … I think I did a good job today! Today I ate three big meals and two snacks, and I think I’m going to take a lesson from my achy stomach and try three smaller meals and two snacks tomorrow.

This morning around 8 after I went to check on Mr. Boomer (I’m watching him since my mom is out of town), I made banana pumpkin oatmeal in a jar! My mix was 1/2 C of Quaker Oats, 1 C soy milk, 1/2 of a banana, chia seeds, almond slivers, coconut bits, cinnamon, vanilla, pumpkin pie spice, salt, and pumpkin stirred in the end. Topped with banana, granola, and peanut butter. I just adore oatmeal because it keeps me full throughout the morning. Yes, it’s a bit of a carb overload, but that’s okay! It’s ENERGY. I need to branch out from my oatmeal rut and try some eggs and toast in the morning, so perhaps that’s what I’ll eat tomorrow.

I went to the gym after breakfast and lifted some weights. Then I walked Boomer around the block … he’s 15 years old, so he loves to piddle! Sweet ol’ man.

Around 11, I had a Pacific Rose apple with cinnamon … I just love my daily apple!

Lunch time! I baked some Pioneer Woman Perfect Salmon with some roasted broccoli and brown rice complete with some stir fry sauce (it’s just soy sauce, brown sugar, rice vinegar, garlic, cornstarch, and a bit of chicken broth with some sesame seeds mixed in).

After lunch, I felt literally stuffed and fat and ugly. I’m still working on dealing with the sensation of feeling full, y’all. I look at myself in the mirror and see this bloated, gross person staring back at me … I know in my heart that I’m neither ugly nor fat, but my brain likes to tell me otherwise. ED’s are a battle of the brain, my friends, and my brain LOVES lying to me about my looks and my feelings. My stomach also sends signals after I eat which scream “I’m UNCOMFORTABLE! You should purge!” … it’s a big battle, I ain’t gonna sugarcoat it. But I’m dealing with it as best I can.

Luke had the day off today, so we relaxed – Luke hurt his back recently and needed to chill out – and petted kitty cats …

ย … and I ran to my mom’s house a billion times to let Boomer out to go potty (he has a weak bladder and gets fluids for his kidneys, so I let him out often).

Around 4:30, I wanted something to munch on, so I cut up some cucumber and carrot and served them with some light Fiesta Ranch and salt.

Luke made us bison burgers for dinner with pepper jack cheese, and I roasted some sweet potato. We added fresh heirloom tomato, romaine, and pickle to the burgers. Ketchup on the side for dipping. Mango kombucha to drink for me, strawberry ale for Luke. Very yummy!

Now I’m off to check on Mr. Boomer one more time and to digest my burger (yes, I’m dealing with a stuffed tummy again tonight)! Hope you’ve had a nice day, my friends. It’s so nice and HOT here! ๐Ÿ™‚

~ Mandy